Sunday, November 9, 2014

FEARLESS


By: Michaela
*photocred to Calvetti


In two short months, I’ll be 21. 

Twenty-one.

Even just seeing those words typed out give my the shivers. I’m entering headlong into possibly one of the most glorious and confusing, rewarding and frustrating periods of my life known as young adulthood. I made it. I survived the impossible workings of high school and teenager-hood only to realize that I no more have my act together or really know what is going on in my life than I did at age 16.

Sure. I am more knowledgeable about life in general. I’ve worked several jobs at once, traveled extensively and met a myriad of people from all walks of life. Heck, I’ve even paid taxes. And I’m just now starting school again with high aspirations of what I want to do with my life. 

Yet, I’m still scared to do so much of what I want to do. Sound familiar to you? 

We grow up being told that we can do and be whatever or whoever we want. (Hands up if at one point you wanted to be President of the United States.) We believe it. We believe it, that is, until the end of high school and we are buried up to our eyeballs in college applications and tuition fees. We realize our dreams will require money and work and sleepless nights and doing things waaay out of our comfort zone. Slowly, many in the legions of dreamers will quietly back away and settle for something sub-par; something that they can tolerate for the rest of their lives, but not really enjoy. They forget to live.

I’ve been guilty of this. Of being too afraid of failure or embarrassment to step out and do something crazy. To take a deep breath and pursue something that I’ve always wanted to do. To meet new people, form new relationships and experience new cultures. Yet, I would let those opportunities slide away. “I still have plenty of time,” I reassure myself. “This isn’t the only chance I have to do this.”

Hmm... Really? Says who? Says the girl who is busy swallowing her disappointment over skipping out on something that pushes her from her comfort zone? 

I chose an unconventional route after high school- not starting college right away and working to save money. I also did quite a bit of volunteer work because I knew I wanted to work with children or international families somehow; possibly even missions work. I also didn’t want to blow a ton of money on school if I didn’t have a clear vision of what I wanted to do. So I waited and worked and saw most of my friends head off to college. I’m not going to lie. It was hard. As was enduring the judgmental looks and head shakes of people when I told them my current plans. 
   “But you are so intelligent. You would do so well at college.”
Thank you. I feel less like an idiot now. Not.
   “You need to get out and do things. Meet some guys.”
Surprisingly, I don’t need to be in a relationship to have confidence in myself or to validate my level of “hotness.” (What does that even mean, anyway? That objectification just makes me angry.) I often had to bite back irate retorts. I work. I volunteer. I have hobbies. I go out with friends. I do have a life. It was in the midst of the trepidation and frustration over people’s lack of understanding, I  finally realized something. 

I don’t have to let other people’s opinions sway my decisions in life. It was my life and I had to really think, really pray about what I wanted my life to look like. That looks different for everyone. For many, their lives include college or some other type of schooling. For others, it doesn’t. Neither one is wrong or right. 


Everyone is so preoccupied with “having a life” or in waiting for the “next big thing” to happen that they forget to live. I’m learning to slow down and cultivate relationships- to do things that impact other people. It’s when we take the focus off of ourselves that we can truly see that is beautiful and what it important in life. 
   
You don’t have to have everything figured out. There is a lot of immense pressure on young adults to have a game plan for the next 4 or 5 years in, or out, of college. While it is important to be prepared and responsible, our twenties are meant to be the years of daring. Exploration. Discovering who you are as a person and where your talents and passions lie. Play around with different interests or pursue a hobby. Travel to one place a year that you’ve never been and it doesn’t have to be exotic or out of country either. 

This is my challenge to you. Make your twenties mean something. Live purposefully. Trust me, it’s harder than it sounds, but so rewarding.

Don’t make apologies for who you are and what you do. There will always be people who think you should be doing things differently. Politely disagree with them. This is your life. 

Don’t waste these years only to look back yearn-fully on them and think “I wish I would have had the guts to (fill in the blank).” Find those guts now and do whatever it is that you are putting off. An interview for a dream job or internship. Trying a weird new food. Being a tourist in your own town for a day. Taking the time to talk to that guy or that girl you always seem to run into while you’re out. Making a new friend. Volunteering for a cause close to your heart.

There was one line in Paulo Coehlo’s “The Alchemist” that really appealed to my romantic tendency  “It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” 

Isn’t that the truth? 
   
So tell me. How are you going to spend your young adult years? Why don’t you hang up those excuses and set a groundwork of fearlessness and dedication for the rest of your life? 

As Robin Williams said, “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.”




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